Archives For Mary

The Dawn of Grace, charcoal & conte sketch on paper

The Dawn of Grace, charcoal & conte sketch on paper

On the twelfth and final day of Christmas sketches…

The corner: It’s in the kitchen by the hallway. It is a terrible place of dread and woe. Sitting in this horrible place elicits tears, the stomping of feet and the gnashing of teeth. It’s where we put the naughty children.

In the corner, you have to think about how you can act better: how should you treat your brother? Why don’t we yell and scream at mommy? Why do we not cheat at Candyland? The hard questions in life…

Throughout these 12 days of Christmas sketches, I’ve worked to be “better”…to live in greater peace, to show more kindness, to daily recognize the treasure of my family and the life I am so lucky to live.

At Christmas, we celebrate the dawn of grace

The chance to begin anew, second chances in small moments and in great mistakes. Grace to me is the recognition of our humanity, that we are a mess, but it’s just part of it. We get the wonderful gift of making innumerable changes, of “making it better.”

We aren’t perfect; we yell at our mommies and push our brothers. We ignore the hungry, and harbor hatred. We are selfish, and angry and ungrateful; impatient, intolerant and rude.

But we are also capable of great love, of profound kindness; of making peace, of helping others, of always improving; of living in response to the dawn of grace, and using our one small and precious life to make this world a better place. To bring peace on earth, goodwill to men.

“Strange, isn’t it? Each man’s life touches so many other lives.”

-Clarence, It’s a Wonderful Life

Silent night, holy night
Son of God, love’s pure light
Radiant beams from thy holy face
With the dawn of redeeming grace
Jesus, Lord at Thy birth
Jesus, Lord at Thy birth

12 Drummers Drumming

12 Drummers Drumming

Mr. Grinch, charcoal & conte sketch on paper

Mr. Grinch, charcoal & conte sketch on paper

On the eleventh day of Christmas sketches…

Today I think my shoes must be too tight…or maybe my head isn’t screwed on just right.

More likely, it’s because I went shopping on a very windy day with a baby sans-stroller and a mischievous little boy. I am feeling a bit Grinchy…enough of the presents, the ribbons, the wrappings, the tags!

Now back at home in my store-free haven, (where I still may be a bit testy…), I’m trying to shake it off and rekindle my Christmas spirit!

“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”
-Dr. Seuss
11 Pipers Piping

11 Pipers Piping

Raising a Glass, charcoal & conte sketch on paper

Raising a Glass, charcoal & conte sketch on paper

On the tenth day of Christmas sketches…

14 women, several bottles of wine and a fancy karaoke machine…recipe for one funny staff Christmas party.

While at parties, I may be more of a wallflower, there was no end to the amusement of watching my staff members sing their hearts out to Trisha Yearwood and Aerosmith. My cheeks are still sore from laughing so hard.

Years ago, after my family and I  moved back to Birmingham from Atlanta, we took some risks. After attending seminary and working as a children’s minister for 5 years, I took a chance by stepping out of those roles and into a poor economy to begin my career as an artist. I worked some odd jobs…teaching preschool a few days a week, teaching art classes, cleaning houses…to piece things together while I built my art reputation from the ground up. It definitely wasn’t easy, and I missed having a community of friends.

But I was making choices, with the support of my family, to do what I love.

I absolutely love my jobs. I couldn’t be happier.  Working with a group of teachers so smart, fun and special; getting to know all our preschoolers and their families at our sweet little school…while at the same time maintaining an active art career, connecting with artists and my close group of “art friends.”

As we kept shouting to one of our more “enthusiastic” karaoke singers last night, I am “living the dream!!!!”

“Never permit a dichotomy to rule your life, a dichotomy in which you hate what you do so you can have pleasure in your spare time. Look for a situation in which your work will give you as much happiness as your spare time.”
-Picasso

Cheers to loving what you do, and to great friends, who add so much joy to my life!

10 Lords-a-Leaping

10 Lords-a-Leaping

Old Wooden Train, charcoal & conte sketch on paper

Old Wooden Train, charcoal & conte sketch on paper

On the ninth day of Christmas sketches…

Slow as molasses. This phrase has NEVER been used to describe me.

I’m a busy lady, like those “9 Ladies Dancing,” and I like to get things checked off the list and done ASAP. On the go, that’s me.

It’s early morning and I am (shockingly) awake. It’s quiet and dark, and I hear a Birmingham train whistling in the distance…the world is slow and sleepy. My cats are stretching, the neighborhood is still. An important piece to my Christmas journey has floated into my thoughts:

take it slow.

There are so many wonderful things we like to do at Christmas: the carousel at the mall, Zoolight Safari at the zoo, advent calendar activities, visiting Santa, watching all our Christmas movies, making S’mores on the fire; we thought about taking a quick trip to Atlanta or Nashville.

All those activities are fun, but too much fun is just too much. We’ve resolved to take this Christmas slowly…

do less, enjoy more.

I can already breathe easier, as the sun begins to rise and the sky begins to lighten. Longer hugs, slower S’more roasting sessions, less rushing, less fussing, more peace, less pressure.

We’re taking the slow train this Christmas, and enjoying the view.

9 Ladies Dancing

9 Ladies Dancing

 

Silly Girl, charcoal & conte sketch

Silly Girl, charcoal & conte sketch

On the eighth day of Christmas sketches…

It’s hard to take “eight maids-a-milking” seriously…several applicable jokes come to mind, but I’ll keep my snickering to myself and spare you.

It’s been a heavy few days. Like many parents, it was hard to send my 1st grader off to school today, and I kept my eyes peeled in my preschool office, watching out the window and thinking of all the “what ifs” that have been haunting Americans since Friday.

It’s easy to get sucked into fear… But we remember these words at Christmas: “do not be afraid, for I bring you good news of a great joy!”

We have life. We have joy. We have “maids-a-milking” jokes, reindeer antlers and blinking light-up noses, Christmas Vacation, silly songs, laughter and love.

Eat, drink and be merry! Life is short, life is good.

8 Maids-a-Milking

8 Maids-a-Milking

A Small Gift, charcoal and conte sketch on paper

A Small Gift, charcoal and conte sketch on paper

On the seventh day of Christmas sketches…

Running errands are not my bag…If I could order everything and have it delivered, I would. I recognize that in today’s world, this is quite possible, but sometimes you have to go to an actual store and pick things out. Like yesterday.

Christmas. Shopping.

Not my idea of fun. To make it worse, I am a penny pincher and don’t like spending money. To make it worse again, I’m trying to purposefully “find” the “true meaning” of Christmas, which makes it confusing to go to Wal-Mart and load up my buggy with toys. I was at a mental crossroads (please hear some sarcasm).

I’ve posted a lot about my son lately…he is a comical little fellow who drops tons of story-telling opportunities right in my lap, just by being his quirky little self. But I have two other wonderful children. My working-answer to my Christmas shopping query comes as I think of them.

As we shopped, my husband and I tried not to just grab random toys to have presents to give (though I dare say at the end of said shopping trip we may or may not have been chunking in “stocking stuffers” as we walked passed displays, without an ounce of thought besides “get me out of heeeeeere!!!!!”).

We tried to think of what makes our 7-year-old tick, what makes our 5-year-old unique, what makes our 8-month-old happy, and choose gifts to encourage their talents, their joys and their creativity.

Same for my parents; same for my sister; same for anyone else we plan to “gift” this year.

Christmas is not “about” presents, but they definitely seem to be #2 on the list. Gifts should be a thoughtful gesture… And I’m not buying the “show your love by buying a Lexus,” over-commercialized Christmas. I’m aiming for a reasonable, loving gesture…something that says “I thought about you; I know you and thought you would like this gift from me.”

Gifts are definitely a part of Christmas, and a part of being human. We want to do something for others. We can downsize our gift-giving. We can give to those in need. But, I really would love to have more peace about Christmas shopping.

When it comes to Christmas “gifting,” my best understanding at the end of the day is this:

Make them meaningful. Make them count.

7 Swans-a-Swimming

7 Swans-a-Swimming

Paper Shoes, charcoal & conte sketch

Paper Shoes, charcoal & conte sketch

On the sixth day of Christmas sketches…

Today was a good family day… much needed in the midst of mourning over “inhumanity” and the remembrance of little children near and far whose lives have been stolen. My emotions, as so many others are experiencing, have swung like a pendulum all day: I picture the faces of frightened children and I weep; I sing Christmas songs with my children and feel warm; I think of the children who won’t ever have another Christmas and I hurt; I choose gifts for my children and I feel proud of who they are.

Tonight we loaded up to finally get our Christmas tree. As we entered the garden section of a nearly-deserted Lowe’s, curious attention and questions were directed at my son.

That would be because he was shuffling along in paper shoes.

Apparently, we didn’t notice him get into the car without real shoes, so his homemade paper and blue painters-tape shoes it was. We bought a slightly scraggly clearance tree, strapped it to the top of our Jeep, and the kids sang “We Three Kings” loudly all the way home.

It’s tempting to be paralyzed by fear, to want to tuck my children away, like eggs in a nest, sheltering them from harm. But that’s not living. Living is wearing paper shoes because you want to, singing loudly, and laughing at your Christmas tree…

living in love, not in fear.

“I never thought it was such a bad little tree. It’s not bad at all, really. Maybe it just needs a little love. ” -Linus, A Charlie Brown Christmas

“All you need is love. Love is all you need.”

-the Beatles
6 Geese-a-Laying

6 Geese-a-Laying

Nativity Play, charcoal and conte sketch

Nativity Play, charcoal and conte sketch

On the fifth day of Christmas…

Today I cried. Twice, actually, and I don’t cry very often.

I cried once out of joy and gratefulness; I cried again out of pain and grief, both times shedding tears over the innocence and beauty of children.

Our preschool nativity play was today.  My precious little boy drew the part of Joseph, and his tiny stature and sweet little self melted me. My baby girl, dressed as an angel, entered with her baby classmates for the final song, and melted my heart even more.

Standing to the side, I was overwhelmed by love for all those kids, teachers and parents.  I was so grateful to be able to be the director of this wonderful school. I was so proud of all of them, and so proud to be a part of it. I felt the tears coming, and my chin quivering, and I cried…so happy, so proud, so thankful.

After school, I learned of the horrific tragedy in Newtown, Connecticut. Impatient to get my own child from elementary school and hold her close and tight, I wept for the families and children involved in that unspeakable event. The outrage, fear, grief and helplessness I feel are palpable. Innocent, precious, happy and vulnerable children…my words are lost.

For the beauty and innocence of children, let us pray
For the joy and wonder of children, let us pray
For the purity and love of children, let us pray

At the end of our Christmas program, the Nativity cast lined up to say their much-practiced lines in the microphone. My little “Joseph,” the smallest of the bunch, shared the closing line standing on tip toes. Let us join with him in sharing this ancient phrase, and live to  make this world a better place:

“And on earth, peace and goodwill toward men”

5 Golden Rings

5 Golden Rings

Little Elf, charcoal and conte on paper

My Little Elf, charcoal and conte on paper

On the fourth day of Christmas sketches…

4 Calling Birds fit well into my day: lots. of. noise.

Being calm and finding peace in the midst of the rush and whirl of life takes a lot of effort. A LOT of intentional effort.

I woke up late; it was a busy day at work. I had a packed out afternoon full of complications, rude drivers, and a shopping trip (thankfully only with one child instead of all 3!) during which I discovered at the register that my wallet was at home. So, we left the buggy to the side, drove home in traffic to retrieve the rogue wallet, then drove back in traffic to the store, to stand in line yet again to purchase my load.

I was quite proud of myself: I was still feeling calm and peaceful up to this point. The traffic didn’t get to me; the rude drivers gave me reason to teach my kids about being kind; I found humor in the forgotten wallet. Yet, I say “up to this point” for a reason. The cashier lady tipped me over the edge. I recognize she’s had a long day dealing with fussy customers…I get it. I’ve had a long day too. But, man, the attitude just got to me.

In the car, I vented on the phone and reigned myself back in. My daughter (who has had a streak of bad-attitude lately) and I talked about how good attitudes and bad attitudes will rub off on others. She blamed the cashier for making me frustrated… Cue the next life lesson: we have control over ourselves. Sure, the lady got under my skin. Yep, I got pretty irritated. But I’m my own person and have choices to make.

At those times, like tonight, when I think I might just lose it, I purposefully find my calm by recognizing my family. Thinking of my family grounds me and puts things in perspective. I think of my chubby little baby, my sweet kids, my strong and steady husband: my comforts, my constants. The frustrating trivialities fade, and I am surrounded by a grateful peace.

What brings you peace?

4 Calling Birds

4 Calling Birds

One-armed bendy Santa, charcoal and conte sketch

One-armed bendy Santa, charcoal and conte sketch

On the third day of Christmas sketches…

We all like something weird, some little trinket that strings along memories that other eyes can’t see. It holds sentimental value like a treasure, though it may be locked away in the trivial shell of an old toy.

Each year as I pull out decorations, there are a few pieces that stand out more than others; a few that I dig around for, searching through attic-musty tissue papers in the Christmas box. My one-armed bendy Santa is one of those oddly precious objects.

He has a wonky, yellowed beard, mismatched painted eyes, and an excellent wooden cone hat. He’s one of those toys where you push the round base from below and it makes the figure slump, then you release it and he pops back up. He’s old and you can tell…he was part of my paternal grandmother’s collection, and he has been around my whole life.

Now, this is the grandmother who was an artist. She taught me the basics of art and let my cousins, sister and I have regular, free-for-all craft time at her house. She was quirky, inventive, interesting and fabulous. And she collected EVERTHING: rocks, bells, books, flowers, these little toys…you name it. She had a room in which the walls were completely covered in framed family photos (aka “the picture room”).  I apparently get the urge to collect and create from her, along with a lot of other quirks that my sister likes to point out. Ha!

Anyway, this little cockeyed, one-armed bendy Santa makes me think of her, my delightfully eccentric grandmother, and it warms my heart each Christmas.

3 French Hens

3 French Hens