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Wide World: Age

Mary Liz Ingram —  July 13, 2014 — Leave a comment

As twilight fell, the hour was late.

By a river we walked, a thin path columned by tall grass and soft Queen Anee’s Lace. My hands fell gently upon the white flowers, as they bent in the direction of my steps. Searching for a bridge we never found, our stomachs full on roast and yorkshire pudding, we wandered past mossy tombstones, a sleeping country church, steep cliffs and quiet trees. Across the stream, we could see the glowing facade of Willersley Castle, the manor house in which we slept for the night, windows open to the cool night air.

We’d been to York and Epworth earlier in the day. We stretched our heads back to take in the tall magnificence of Yorkminster Cathedral. We felt the echoing organ fill every corner of the beautifully cavernous sanctuary. We climbed high and walked the ring atop Clifford’s Tower, looking down upon York with it’s ancient streets and yellow bicycles, banners and window displays preparing for the upcoming Tour de France…a city full of color and life, people walking, laughing and eating ice cream.

Epworth, EnglandIn Epworth we walked through the peacefully frozen house of John Wesley, preserved and restored like a snap in time. I touched the leaves of the garden plants and smelled the lavender on my hand. The quiet street was only interrupted by the call of a raven and the bleating of sheep. Near a church, we found a green field and a short path between trees. Exploring it’s ending, we found a spreading field of barley.

Such history preserved.

Again I lost sense of space and time and felt sucked backwards to earlier days, an immersion in ages past. When people gardened and read and walked and lived without such haste and stress. When life took more effort, but probably saw more of reality.

Maybe. Maybe not.

But it encouraged me to slow my pace, to open my eyes and to work with my hands.

The next morning, with mist still rising, we walked down a quiet street to St. Mary’s Church in Lutterworth. Inside, young children rode on bright plastic push cars, drank juice from sippy cups, played and laughed and cried, filling up the old stone space with the sounds and activity of today, of new life. Outside next to a blooming hydrangea and 15th century tombstones, I met a mother from Vermont and her baby girl. Now living in England, she shared my appreciation for the rich history and beauty of the place. Like I was trapped in a bubble, our easy, American conversation was a reminder of the present. The present living in and among the ancient. It’s something we are not used to, living in our young country across the sea.

St. Mary's Church in Lutterworth, England, marker & ink doodle

St. Mary’s Church in Lutterworth, England, marker & ink doodle

 

It was an out of body experience, like walking on clouds.

I almost couldn’t contain myself, and much of my internal excitement did spill out in bouncing waves. I felt the huge urge to frolic and spin, but I held back just enough. It was a spiritual experience, one of the highest points in my life.

Driving down into northern England from Scotland, we took a detour to a remote location to see a well-preserved section of Hadrian’s Wall…the far stretching stone wall built by the Romans to keep the empire’s borders in check.

Northern England, marker & ink doodle

Northern England, marker & ink doodle

June 22, 2014

“In the middle of the gorgeous – amazing – quiet, rolling hills of northern England, in the breeze and sunshine of an early summer morning, the only sounds being singing birds and bleating sheep, we hiked up a steep, craggy hill among the green grass, yellow flowers and purple thistle. It was like a dream.

I felt like crying, dancing, standing still and never leaving. I was ready to sell my belongings and send for the kids, moving to that fantastic countryside. One of the happiest, highest moments of my life.”

My entire sense of self was overwhelmed, the landscape had such a pull upon my soul. I wanted to stay there forever, letting the hills become my waterlilies, an artistic obsession like the garden for Monet. I imagined the scene through all its changes, in its snowbound winters and russet fall, the light rising, the sun setting, the moon glowing.

Clover Crown, marker, colored pencil & ink doodle

Clover Crown, marker, colored pencil & ink doodle

On the walk back to the bus, a sweet friend and I picked clover.

As I dawdled slowly behind, soaking every second before we drove away, I tied the flowers into a crown. Being the responsible, adult, 32-year-old working mother of three that I am, I of course popped the crown on my head and skipped around like a small child. Why not?

It was glorious. I am surprised I did not physically explode.

One day, I will be back.

 

Party time in Edinburgh“Friday night we walked to dinner. Up the stairs we entered a vaulted room – like a church – lit dimly with candles and pink and purple lights in the high, arched ceiling. We had champagne or whisky, then beer and food. Afterwards they cleared the floor and music began on the colorfully lit stage, fast Scottish music complete with an accordion. We danced and laughed and had so much fun. We danced in a circle and I shed my introverted nerves, threw my head back in laughter and danced with all sorts of people as we traded partners going round and round…my husband, our friends, Scottish girls I didn’t know, Scottish boys I didn’t know, and an old man who kept saying “oh! oh!” like he thought he was going to fall over! I haven’t felt like that in, well, ever…”

In Costume, ink doodles

In Costume, ink doodles

This glowing, swirling plunge into Edinburgh led to a carefree journey full of child-like exploration.

We got up early and poked around gardens and churchyards. I scampered up and down the skinny Closes (alleys) between stores. We sat on stone walls listening to bagpipers and we took a late night tour of the spooky underground homes and rooms of the buried Mary King’s Close.

We stuck our heads in the huge cannon Mons Meg on top of Edinburgh Castle, feebly attempted to use some new Scottish phrases with our poor accents, made new friends and shed the skins of our “grown up” responsibilities, at least for a little while.

My Stephen took the opportunities to get in costume, dressing like John Knox in the oldest house in Edinburgh and posing for pictures, and later having a fake sword fight in chain mail with an actor playing Robert the Bruce. He lost this “wee skirmish,” and we couldn’t stop laughing.

I left Edinburgh with full memories of light-hearted fun and games, with lessons and practice in letting go and living life in joy and laughter.

Edinburgh, colored pencil & ink doodle

Edinburgh, colored pencil & ink doodle

St. Andrews Cathedral, Scotland: marker, colored pencil & ink doodle

St. Andrews Cathedral, Scotland: marker, colored pencil & ink doodle

June 20, 2014

“Germany was beautiful, but Scotland feels free.

Germany had some heaviness and sadness about it – regret, remembrance of hardship, mixed with a new tolerance and beauty and peace. It was picturesque – like a movie set.

Scotland feels like sun and air and sea. It makes you want to hold your arms out and drink in the sun and the swirling air. To touch the stones and lay in the grass. To laugh and play.

The rough clan and religious history of the feisty Scots is fascinating…tunneling under castles to hurry sieges, deceptions and dungeons, William Wallace and Robert the Bruce, thistles and sheep, stone and sea.”

At this point in my journey, I lose track of the time and day. My journal becomes a mass of elation as we explore Scotland. I feel like I’ve found the mothership. Every day was filled with golden sun and soft green grass, flowers and breezes and sparkling sea, medieval watchtowers perched high on the craigs. Based in Edinburgh, we traveled out to St. Andrews our first morning in Scotland, the air crisp but not cold, perfect and refreshing.

“We went to St. Andrew’s Cathedral and St. Andrew’s Castle. I was blown away by the beauty of the place. The sun on my face, sea breeze bringing the seagulls’ calls through the air, my feet on the thick green grass scattered with tiny daisies, surrounded by the ruins with so many stories to tell. We climbed up narrow, twisting stone stairs to the the top of the tower at the broken cathedral. We crouched and scurried deep into the mine and counter-mine of the castle’s harsh Protestant-Catholic wars. I was giddy crawling through while water dripped on my face and I carefully placed my feet.”

Scotland, marker & ink doodle

Scotland, marker & ink doodle

We spent another day visiting the Famous Grouse Scotch distillery, tasting and laughing and enjoying our time together. Driving back to Edinburgh, watching the green hills roll past, seeing the sheep that I’ve drawn for so long, the black-faced, white, shining, familiar Scottish sheep, the mossy stone walls, the blue skies and rich fields stretching on and on in this glorious country…my heart was full. Passing the William Wallace Memorial and Stirling Castle, I wrote:

“This land inspires me; it makes me want to change. The feeling of freedom, of space and simplicity. I’m overwhelmed and moved by this place. We work hard everyday. Up and work, sleep and start over. Clean up, eat up…so much life to live. We toil and waste and spin our wheels and webs. I want to be better.”

“The world is wide, and I will not waste my life in friction when it could be turned into momentum.” -Frances E. Willard

Germany, ink doodles

Bonhoeffer Sites, Berlin: ink doodles

I stood in the street and looked around me. The day was gray and misty, the sidewalks busy, the traffic heavy. A few barricades protected me where I stood, and l spun slowly around, taking in the panorama. I stood on a mismatched stripe of stones, running straight through the city. I murmured the name of the city to myself, “Berlin.” I was standing in Berlin, on the spot where the Berlin Wall once divided the city, and essentially the country.

Growing up in the ’80s, and taking German for four years in high school, Berlin is familiar to me…the one name brings with it trails of information, history and images. And now I stood in the middle of Berlin.

We stood in front of the Reichstag, with the German flags flying. We stood in front of the huge Brandenburg Gate. We visited the Pergamon Museum, eating a sack lunch among the columns riddled with old wounds from bullets and shrapnel. We wandered through the strange, high blocks of the Holocaust Memorial, passed Checkpoint Charlie and sections of the Berlin Wall. We heard a lone musician play guitar in the peeling, echoing space of Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s church and walked through lines of birch trees to Bonhoeffer’s memorial in a Berlin cemetery. And we stood in line at a souvenir shop, being bullied back by a gaggle of elderly French women, making us late for the rendezvous at the pink bus (sorry fellow travelers).

The Pergamon Museum was a maze of incredible, ancient treasures.

Ishtar Gate at the Pergamon Museum, marker & ink doodle

Ishtar Gate at the Pergamon Museum, marker & ink doodle

 

The moment that sticks with me most from Berlin was the surprising emotions and images evoked by the Holocaust Memorial:

June 19, 2014

“At first it just looked like a bunch of stone blocks. It seemed less than impressive. As you begin walking through, the ground dips down in rolling, thin paths, as the cold gray slabs grow taller. Sound is echoing and muffled and you begin to feel small, insignificant, lost, trapped…It’s so quiet. You see people pass in front of you and then disappear, swallowed up. You weave your way back and forth among the tall pillars, and finally begin rising out as the ground steeps and the blocks shrink. A beautiful, surprising monument to a time when so many disappeared, swallowed up, and so many felt lost, cold and afraid. When you emerge, you remember the survivors who found freedom and escape, and rekindle hope that such evil will be prevented as we learn lessons from the past.” 

Reichstag & Holocaust Memorial, ink doodles with colored pencil

Reichstag & Holocaust Memorial, ink doodles with colored pencil

 

In our big pink bus, we travelled to Wittenberg, famed as the spot where Martin Luther nailed his 95 Theses to the door of the church, becoming a major turning point in the Protestant Reformation.

Wittenberg, GermanyIn another beautiful, peaceful, medieval German town, we toured Luther’s house, saw Luther chocolate (?), Luther monuments, and even ate a “Luther Meal”:

“We ate some pork, beef and chicken with wine sauce, vegetables from ‘Katie’s Garden’ (carrots, turnips and parsnips), mashed peas, brown bread with mustard, apple dumpling, and of course wine. We ate and drank out of cool ceramic goblets and plates.” -journal excerpt

By the end, we’d had our fill of Martin Luther.

Martin Luther, ink sketch

Martin Luther, ink sketch

Though characterized as “the father of the Reformation,” and without question a highly important figure in church history, Luther was a real jerk sometimes. He said a lot of rotten stuff, and did a lot of rotten stuff. But he also worked hard to affect real change, real reforms that were definitely needed. He stood strong against corruption and didn’t give in to serious opposition. He was a real person, mixed with good and bad, and he made a place in history by working for what he believed was good and right.

As a side note, I have to share that we walked down some stairs and peered through a hole in a stone wall, looking at a mirror to see a reflection of Martin Luther’s toilet. Oh yes. I saw his loo, his WC. He apparently, like so many of us, did a lot of brainstorming in the bathroom. Don’t judge.

Wittenberg

Wittenberg

 

Buchenwald. A concentration camp that served as a Nazi work camp and place of the utmost horror, suffering and hatred during WWII. We visited this place early in our trip.

My journal reflections:

June 18, 2014

“In the bright, warm sun, ringed by green trees full of singing birds, we crunched across the expanse of gray gravel in a place that has seen unfathomable horrors.

Small flowers and an orange butterfly were by my feet while I stood steps away from the crematorium, the “doctor’s” office, and a room that is the closest thing to hell on earth I have ever experienced: a cellar with metal hooks hung high around the room, a room in which humans systematically and efficiently strangled other humans, groups at a time, causing them a horrible, slow death. Humans – all humans.

A metal monument rests warm in the ground in this sheet of gray wasteland,in memory of those who suffered in this place. It warms to remind us of our body temperature…when you place your hand on its surface, you remember we all share life, we are all human. Buchenwald is over. Hatred is not; discrimination is not. We all must do our part to rehumanize, to restore dignity to those dehumanized by their fellows, and to work against hatred.

As we walked out of Buchenwald, I was alone. I walked down the path and heard my feet crunching. I heard birds chirping so loudly, ringing in my ears. Birds don’t hate each other. Only humans are capable of such cruelty and torture, such atrocities. Birds just live. The world has such beauty, and it is intermingled with such horror.”

So struck by the life in and around the camp – the flowers at my feet, a butterfly, a bee, the singing birds, the everyday life on the hills beyond its borders – which stands in such contrast to the bleak, gray gravel, I drew the life and land and color surrounding the field of deathly gray. The dichotomy of life, with its beauty and goodness, and its cruelty and horror. All in one.

Buchenwald: marker, colored pencil & ink doodle

The last place we visited on our way out was the camp’s prison, as if the camp itself wasn’t prison enough. There were pictures and memorials in the cells of the men who were kept there, men who spoke out and refused to bend to such evil. Two of them wore clerical collars. I recorded in my journal:

“We remember your stand, even if you did not live through it. We are glad you did not bend no matter what cruelty and violence was put upon you by your fellow humans who operated at their basest level. We hope and pray these things will end – I would say never come again, but I know torture and hatred continue in this moment in many forms. May we do our part, with even a portion of your courage, to lessen such hatred, to speak against it, to save those who live in a hell.”

Erfurt, GermanyThe city of Erfurt makes me want to move to Germany.

Rich with history and beauty – we passed a house by the river that had a building date of 1328! – but on the cutting edge of modern eco-responsiblity, the place seemed perfectly beautiful, perfectly peaceful, quiet and lovely.

Flowers dripping out of window boxes, cobbled streets brushed clean, running rivers crossing under bridges, bicycles and solar panels…everywhere you look, there was beauty. It felt a bit like IKEA covered in flowers…responsible living, tidy and organized, no space wasted, no space ugly.

As we walked, we came upon a medieval bridge with perfectly crooked houses that people still inhabited. We turned down the street to look between the buildings, and saw rows of colorful umbrellas strung high across the tops, floating down the strip of sky.

We turned out of another pathway of winding streets, surprised to be standing in a huge open square with a gorgeous cathedral planted in its center, shining golden in the evening light.

Magnificent. It makes you feel good to be alive. It encourages me to live more responsibly in my place.

Erfurt & Eisleben, Germany: colored pencil & ink doodles

Erfurt & Eisleben, Germany: colored pencil & ink doodles

Traveling Doodle SuppliesI’ve never been to Germany before. It is one of the most beautiful, peaceful and clean places I’ve ever been. We drove around the country on a big pink tour bus. All of my drawings from the trip were drawn on buses, trains or planes, making for some bumpy doodling. I decided any stray marks or wiggly lines just add character.

For my travel doodles, I carried a sturdy new notebook that would fit in my small bag, a set of 4 Staedtler ink pens, a small set of Faber-Castell PITT artist pens (brush markers), and a small box of Prismacolor Art Stix (woodless colored pencils). Everyday I watched for things to catch my eye, I tried to discover the essence of each place, recording my findings on my blank white pages.

Here are my first impressions of this beautiful country:

June 17, 2014

“In Mainz we walked up quiet streets, passing stacks of bikes, elderly couples holding hands or walking dogs, families with little kids trotting down the cobbled streets. The streets were canopied in beautiful trees with large leaves and smooth bark. Decorative white buildings with red roofs surround our walk. We passed an outdoor market filled with flowers and caught the smell of fresh fish.

At Wartburg Castle, we wound our way up the steep hill past mossy rocks and cheerful daisies to the white-washed walls crossed with thick wooden beams, ancient archways, white doves, cool breezes, and a high view of the German landscape. Sunlight danced on the rolling green fields, the many clusters of villages with their white walls and rust-colored roofs, the dark trees lining and dotting the land, and the huge wind turbines towering over the little towns with their giant, spinning arms.”

"Germany", marker & ink doodle

“Germany”, marker & ink doodle

"In flight", colored pencil & ink doodle

“In flight”, colored pencil & ink doodle

“The world is wide, and I will not waste my life in friction when it could be turned into momentum.” -Frances E. Willard

A week out from a transforming experience, I’ve recovered from jet lag, spent time with my kids, sorted out things missed at work, uploaded photos, and let the adventures rest in my mind. Two weeks in Europe, touring, learning and changing, with a group of 30, thanks to the generosity of family, travels never cease to change a life. In order to cement memories, absorb lessons into my life, and recount my journey through words and art, I’m sharing my daily doodles, journal excerpts and reflections in small bites over the next few weeks.

As with all great journeys, mine starts with leaving one place to go to another.

Equipped with lots of hugs and kisses from my kids, a packed bag, and a tidy stack of traveling art supplies, we headed to the airport in Atlanta, headed for Germany. Ready to experience and discover, always growing and seeking to move forward, reforming and becoming better in order to do my part to better the world.

June 16, 2014

“With the roar of the jet engine ringing in my ear, and the bright sun streaming in through the oval window, we zoom above the puffy clouds towards Germany. Sitting by the window, looking down on the patches of trees, snake-like streets and glimmering drops of lakes, our journey begins.

The engine drowns out the sounds of the mother in front of me. It muffles the conversation of the parts seller who builds his own motorcycles. It blankets the woman clutching her rosary in an unknown fear or grief. It lights the spirit of adventure that makes my heart skip, taking us high from the ground and letting us soar through the blue sky to new places, new people, new experiences. 

Below us, a mountain range of clouds, a landscape made of cotton…

A ribbon of rainbow streaked across the sky as the sun begins to set over the wide ocean.

Dozing in and out of a quickly passing night and into morning, I look down to see the sun rising like a jewel on a blanket of ripples like sheep’s wool. Clouds like an ocean of foam blanketing the sea.”

Germany, ink doodles